#.i have been thinking about this SO much ngl
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Hey! Bamboo toilet paper person here. Your response was very thoughtful-- I want to apologize for placing the onus of climate issues on individual action, haha. I work at a zoo that bills itself as being very heavy on conservation messaging, but as a non-partisan organization we're obviously not allowed to talk about the evils of capitalism. This means that in our programming, we MUST place the responsibility of stopping climate change on individual guests, encouraging them to make more environmentally conscientious decisions like buying reef safe sunscreen or reducing carbon emissions by driving less. The most "political" we're allowed to get is telling people to stay educated and vote in favor of laws that will have a positive impact on the environment. I think I've been drinking the Zoolaid a little TOO much recently, because you're totally right-- the vast, VAST majority of damage to the environment is caused by major corporations, not random people working around their own unique needs. It was also low key a little ableist of me to take issue with that ngl.
Obviously no obligation to respond to this publicly (though it's fine if you choose to do so), but I did want to thank you for your response and mention that it did get through the nonprofit mission-based-organization propaganda living rent free in my head haha. Cheers!
Hey, you work at a zoo? That is SO cool, aadsdggjjg@!!!
And hey, no worries, you totally had a good point about endless waste and trying to counter it where possible- Just from personal experience involved in the barest edge of the fashion industry, I really, really, REALLY hate the idea that, like... people can't access simple shit like plastic straws, even if they're the best, most practical, least-harmful option for them.... because a 12 year old made up some random number for a school project about plastic waste
Where, as a zoo person, I imagine you're already aware that the average sea turtle is WILDLY more likely to die from abandoned plastic fishing nets or ocean-dump grocery bags than accidentally get a straw inside it
So here we are, using paper straws!- which may be an improvement, or may not, I don't have that data, and construction emissions are their own thing- BUT WE STILL HAVE OCEANS FULL OF ABANDONED NETS
WHICH ARE OBJECTIVELY WORSE, but MUCH harder to get rid of, and as the average person doesn't USE fishing nets, it'd much harder to market as a "You, not me" sort of issue.
Cleaning up fishing nets isn't trendy. It isn't sexy. You can't troubleshoot a cute little trendy solution for it that you can market to upwardly-mobile tweens.
But a reusable water bottle? A cute canvas tote? A metal straw? That's a solution you can buy and feel good about.
Never mind that you need to use a single cotton reusable bag somewhere like a million times before the cost of its construction counterbalances the cost of a single grocery bag every time you shop- which, hey, some of us were reusing as trash liners for their wastebaskets, or bundle bags for donating clothes, or lining for our leaky winter boots!
If a better option is available, I'll take it. But as ZERO HARM is next to impossible at this time, I personally am gonna aim for MINIMAL HARM as long as I can.
...sorry, I didn't mean to ramble off again.
But hey, if your nonprofit is doing good things, feel free to shoot me a link! I can post it on my blog :D
(Link to original post for context lol)
#If a company can't sell you a solution then they won't touch the problem#Find a cute and affordable object you can sell to virtue-signalling consumers and MAYBE they'll talk#But just DOING something? The marketing optics better sell enough to justify the expense of THAT
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a cursed realization: wade and logan are old men. logan especially so.
they MUST have weird old man habits and general body weirdness. and not the endearing shit like preferring to use old school tech, or having a "get off my lawn, my favourite miscreants" kinda attitude, or being unable to keep up in sex, or any of that kinda cute stuff
i mean the unpleasant sweaty old man smell, having walking farts, snoring while awake, their stomachs just making noises for no goddamn reason bc their digestive systems are no longer 30 y/o
all of which they don't even realize they're doing bc they're old and either a) have more pressing things to worry about [at their age]; b) stopped giving a fuck; or c) both of the above
source: i live with two very old men (my dad and uncle). one is a few years away from retirement and the other is already at that age. they are family but they are still gross old men who act like drunk uncles given half the chance
and while neither logan or wade are in their 60s, these habits don't just magically appear once you hit that age. they begin long before that and accumulate over time until the stinky old man package is complete
"but jercy," you say, "they have perfect regeneration!! they can't have any health problems!! they're too self-conscious to be that gross!!"
1: (re: perfect regeneration) that is an even worse argument for wade, who has mega cancer and canonically does not smell pleasant or have a properly functioning body. he'd 100% have old man problems as a symptom of his cancer bc his mutation is physically keeping him in a constant state of dying. everything he does is out of sheer stubbornness and willpower to make a joke out of his life
1b: to play on a popular headcanon: any aromatic, artificial fruity skincare routine he has can easily be used as a reason for him to cover up his old man smell
2: see point B above for logan
2b: see the movie, logan (2017), or the comic, death of wolverine (2014), for the fact that logan can canonically age/die. albeit it's at a vastly slower pace than everyone else, but it means logan WILL eventually have these issues with his body too, if he doesn't have them already
2c: feral/animalistic logan who takes on animal traits would be so much worse bc wolverines are called "skunk bears" for a reason. wolverines (and any wildlife/animal that you can compare logan to) fucking STINK!! they have EVEN GROSSER ANIMAL HABITS!! you just gotta accept it
3: (re: self-consciousness) you got a point there, but once again refer to point B. most folks i know at their age are on their way to or have already stopped caring about what others think of them. and even if wade and logan are somehow the exceptions to this, i'm sure they let loose in private and probably indulge in their grosser habits when they're alone
4: if you want biblically accurate old man yaoi you're gonna have to contend with the fact that it comes with the non-sexy old man problems. i'm sorry i have to break the illusion but this is the reality we must face together
5: suspension of disbelief, friends. do engage with that once in a while lol
in conclusion: i unfortunately have every bit of confidence that wade and logan are not exempt to old man behaviours and bodily functions and i will die whining about it. thanks for coming to my ted talk
#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool & wolverine#dp&w#poolverine#wolverpool#deadclaws#peanutbub#deadpool#wade wilson#wolverine#logan howlett#wade wilson x reader#deadpool x reader#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#jercy speaks#meta#.happy 51st birthday 10005 wade wilson!!! i'm exposing yours and logan's old man tendencies!!!#.anyway rip my poolverine week entries y'all just gonna hafta wait kjlfdskljdsflkjdfs#.i have been thinking about this SO much ngl#.sexy old man yaoi must come with un-sexy old man problems 😔😔😔
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Sorry Won't Fix This
lando norris x fem reader
summary: Lando makes the biggest mistake of his life, bigger than any apology, and you both hoped there was a way to fix it. Unfortunately, you both wished it at different times. (5.5k words)
warnings: angst, cheating, mentions of sex, manipulation, mede up characters, use of Y/N
a/n: I FINALLY WROTE MORE ANGST! This is a long one and I held nothing back. I really did try to make it as hurtful and dramatic as possible and ngl I was inspired by 'Don't worry darling' for a tiny part of this (you'll know when you read it) but anyway, this one does NOT have a happy ending so please let me know what you think!
Check out the original request here!
↺ back to navigation — send me a request!
You had a terrible feeling, but you were too scared to look into it, terrified you would be right.
Truth is, you started feeling like that just a few weeks ago, when you went back to Lando’s apartment to surprise him with lunch and found an empty room and the bed unmade from somebody sleeping on it. Any other day that would’ve been completely normal, but you had stayed with him the night before and made the bed as soon as you both got up to get ready for your separate plans for the day, leaving a perfectly made bed to come back to.
Before that day, you would’ve never in a million years thought that Lando would cheat on you. He had always been so loving and caring, even before you started dating, and once you officially became a thing, he would constantly remind you how much he loved you, and on special days he was the most romantic person ever, and you always thought that you would spend the rest of your life with him, but now... you didn’t want to think about it, but you couldn’t bury the thought of him with someone else after it crossed your mind briefly while looking at the messy bed.
Later that night you asked him about it, trying hard not to sound like you were accusing him of something, but his excuse just made you feel worse, your suspicions growing.
“What do you mean?” He asked as he inspected his bed, unsure of what was wrong with it.
“Well, you know, I made the bed this morning before we left, remember?”
“Oh, uh- yeah, I came back to- to take a nap,” he stuttered, not even looking at you.
But it kept happening, a few more times.
Things started to change after that; he cancelled the plans you made for when he came back home, he suddenly was too busy every day and your presence might be a distraction for all the things he had to get done for the next race, he was so tired at night he didn’t have the energy for anything, and he even asked you to go back to sleep in your own apartment, claiming he just needed to sleep on his own to be comfortable, even though you were used to sleeping together.
Long story short, he was distant; he was never around anymore, and even when he was, you felt like you were missing him. He was just... different, and you were beating herself up wondering what had changed.
He, on the other hand, didn’t miss you, seeing he didn’t make an effort anymore and he could go days without answering a text or returning a call, and it was not because you took a long time to reply; you would always respond in a heartbeat if it was him. If it weren’t for all the times you visited him at his apartment when a news outlet brought up that he was back in Monaco to make sure he was doing okay, you wouldn’t talk to each other at all.
But today you were feeling hopeful. It was your anniversary, and you had a date night planned — a date he didn’t cancel, so you took the entire afternoon to do your nails, your hair, and pick a beautiful dress to wear, his favourite dress. Your makeup took a while, but you still managed to be ready on time for the wonderful night you had ahead, so you made your way to him, your palms sweating when you knocked on the door.
“Y/N? What are you doing here?” Was the first thing he asked, wiping her smile off of her face.
“I thought we would go out tonight,” you replied, looking down at your hands to hide your clear disappointment.
“Oh- I guess I forgot to tell you but I remembered I have an important meeting tomorrow morning, so I’m not gonna make it." The door was barely open, and he was standing where the crack was, blocking his apartment as he held the door with a strong grip.
“Okay,” your voice was so faint you barely heard it yourself. “Do you need anything? I could stay here for a couple of hours.”
“No, don’t worry about it. I think it’s better if you leave.”
Tears pricked your eyes, swallowing the small lump forming in your throat. “Why?”
“Well, I’m busy with a few things. You know, I have a really early day tomorrow, and you can’t really help me with a McLaren meeting, can you?”
You shook your head slowly “I guess I’m leaving then.”
The tears you had been holding started to fall as soon as you turned around; you could feel your mascara clumping on your eyelashes and forming black streaks down your cheeks, ruining the contour and highlight you applied in hopes of impressing your boyfriend. You ran back to your car and let it all out once you closed the door. You really thought things would be different tonight, but you were wrong.
You started driving to your best friend’s house, desperate to vent about how terrible your relationship was going since you had been keeping a secret from everyone; the last thing you needed was the media to get in the middle of this.
“Oh my god, Y/N. Are you okay?” Mia asked you when she saw the mascara tears.
You shook your head as you stepped inside, small whimpers leaving your lips as you tried to stop the crying.
“What happened?” She took your hand and guided you to the couch.
“Lando.”
“What about Lando?”
“I think he’s cheating on me." You had never said that out loud, and saying it broke your heart even more. “I wish I was crazy, but the signs... I know he is.”
“I’m not trying to defend him or anything, but what makes you think that?”
“Everything, Mia. He has been acting so... distant. Ever since-” You stopped yourself. You never told anyone your relationship with Lando wasn’t doing so well, making up excuses to cover his. You just wanted to hold on to everyone else’s idea of you two, thinking you were the perfect couple.
“What? Have you guys been fighting?”
You took a deep breath before saying, “Remember the last time I stayed over at his apartment?” She nodded in response, “Well, later that day I went back to surprise him with lunch, but he wasn’t there and the bed was a complete mess, and you know I always make the bed when I wake up. He said he went back to take a nap, but he was supposed to be with Carlos all morning, and it didn’t make sense he had time to come back, take a nap, and then leave again, so I asked Carlos, and they didn’t meet at all that day. Is that insane?”
"No, Y/N, of course not.” Mia didn’t know what to say; she wanted to comfort you but she didn’t know how. “And he’s been acting weird since then?”
You nodded, wiping your tears away. “Yeah, he’s been pushing me away since that day. Telling me he doesn’t have time because he’s so busy with the season, which I understand, but not even answering a couple of texts? And cancelling every date we had planned?”
“Is that what happened today? I thought it was your anniversary.”
“It is.” You were nibbling on your lip profusely, looking up so tears would stop falling. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do.”
“Have you told him how you feel?” You shook your head again; you hated confrontation, and you were hoping you didn’t have to do that. “I think you should go talk to him.”
“Right now?”
“If not now, then when? You say you’ve been feeling like something’s off for a while, but you haven’t said anything to him.”
“I don’t know Mia-”
“If he is cheating on you then you need to break up with him, you don’t deserve to be in that situation, and you deserve to know the truth.”
You inhaled as you considered what Mia just said. She was right, but to be completely honest, you weren’t ready yet. “I really want to know, but I can't.”
“Why not?”
“Because what if he is?” Tears started rolling down your face again, Mia hugging you tight as soon as it happened. “I love him, and... I just want things to go back to normal.”
“I know you do, but believe me, it’s better if you know.”
You stayed there for a while, but ultimately decided to go talk to him, but you needed to put yourself back together before confronting him. Mia helped you to wash your face and fix your hair, comforting you and offering to stay with you once the two of you were done talking. You accepted; you didn’t want to be alone, and Anne, your flatmate, had been going out of town a lot recently, so your apartment was empty, and you knew it’d be a long night.
Once you felt better and ready to talk to him, Mia drove you to his place as you repeated in your head everything you wanted to tell him. You knocked loudly and didn’t stop until he opened. He looked annoyed, and you stormed inside as soon as he opened the door.
“What are you doing?”
“We need to talk.”
“About what?”
You blinked at him twice. Did he not think you needed to talk? “About us, Lando. What’s going on?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Okay, now you were mad. “Lando, you have been ignoring me for days, and I understand if you’re busy, but it doesn’t explain you pushing me away at all times.”
“I’m sorry if you feel that way.”
There was a moment of silence, both of you staring at each other as you tried to remember the questions you were supposed to ask, but none of them seemed to make sense now that you were standing in front of him “That’s all you’re gonna say?”
“What do you want me to say?”
“How about you tell me exactly what’s going on?”
You were both raising your voices, but Lando especially. “I told you already, I’ve been busy with the season-”
“I could’ve stayed here with you or gone with you to races if that meant spending more time together, like we have done before.”
“But why would you want to do that?”
“To keep you company, maybe?”
“But all you do is stand around while I do my job.”
“Lando, do you know how many weeks I’ve spent away from home just so we can be together? And you don’t even care anymore, you didn’t even care to say thank you.”
“I never asked you to come,” he mumbled.
You scoffed before shaking your head. “I wanted to, you know I worry about you when you stress yourself out about a race, you tend to overwork yourself-”
“I. Never. Asked. You. To. Come." He interrupted you, his tone punctuated with each word. “I would’ve been fine without you, I don’t need you in my hair at all times." His eyes hardened, his mouth opening to speak again. “Don’t you have better things to do?”
“I just- I’m your girlfriend, I guess I thought you liked to be with me.”
“I do, but you don’t have to be so clingy all the time.”
You didn’t say anything, hoping you heard it wrong or that he’d apologise, but he didn't. “What?”
“You know, we do everything together and-”
“No, we used to do things together, not everything." You corrected him.
He took a deep breath, as if he was done dealing with you. “Right. Look, I’m tired, we can talk tomorrow.”
You nodded, holding back the tears as you walked towards the door. “Happy anniversary,” you said before slamming it closed and running back to Mia’s car.
Lando sat on his couch with his head between his hands for a moment. How could he forget? He took a deep breath as he got up, looking for a ribbon and a gift he bought for you who knows how long ago.
He made his way to Mia’s flat; he assumed you would be there, and your car parked outside confirmed his suspicions, so he knocked on the door a couple of times before saying, “Baby, I’m sorry. I was caught up in all the things I have to do before leaving, and I didn’t realise what day it was." But he got no response. “Y/N please, I know you’re here. Will you please talk to me?”
“Go away, Lando.” Mia was the one to yell, making Lando realise he would not be able to fix it, not tonight anyway.
“Okay, I’m leaving this here. I- I love you.”
You called in sick for your job the next day, your sore eyes and pounding headache being the only things you could think about. Well, that and Lando.
You were staring at the gift he bought for your one-year anniversary — what you were supposed to celebrate the day before. It was beautiful, and you couldn’t believe he remembered you mentioning it on one of your first dates ever, but it was the letter inside that broke your heart. It looked... unfinished, like he didn’t even care enough to give it a proper ending, so you were wondering how long ago he stopped working on it.
The days after that were rough, long nights of wondering what you could have possibly done wrong, but even then you didn’t talk to him. He tried to, a couple of times, but you needed a little bit of time.
A couple of weeks went by, and you found yourself alone at your apartment, catching up on the work you missed for calling in sick so many times.
It was your birthday, and Mia insisted a million times you go out and celebrate, clear your head, and forget about Lando once in for all, but somehow it felt wrong; you had made plans with Lando a few months back to bring your family to a race so they could finally meet him, but obviously that wasn’t happening anymore, so what was the point of celebrating? You just needed to focus and get things done anyway.
You were thankful that Mia had been for you through it all; you really were, but sometimes crying alone did more for you than having someone tell you ‘everything's gonna be okay.' You were tired of hearing that.
Hours later, you found yourself with a cup of coffee to finally catch up on the last project. It wasn’t really that much of a workload, and you didn’t need to stay up all night to do that, but you were going to anyway. Perhaps you just wanted to be productive, or maybe that was you trying to occupy your mind from the possibility of your boyfriend cheating on you.
You looked at the clock; it was 11:30 PM. You sighed, typing away whatever you were supposed to on your laptop, your eyes sore from staring at it for too long, when a text message interrupted you.
Unknown [Attachment: 1 photo]
Unknown: I heard they have been at it for a while.
That text message induced such a great shock on your tired, worn-out body, tears falling down your face as soon as you read it. You didn’t want to open it as you were sure of what this was about, but your curiosity got the best of you.
Tapping on the notification, you prepared yourself mentally to confirm your terrible suspicions. And they were confirmed.
Your vision was blurry from the tears, but you were able to see Lando standing next to his new Ferrari, and he was with someone else, except you couldn’t see who it was, the big jacket and a beanie protecting her identity. He was smiling down at her, eyes full of... love? Those green eyes you thought he reserved for you only, but clearly you were wrong. His big hands were around her waist as hers went around his neck, and his lips were stained with lipstick.
You broke down crying, curled up on your bed as you wore one of Lando’s hoodies that still smelt like him. You now knew what the truth was, but you didn’t want to accept it. What happened to you two? When did he stop loving you?
It was like your heart was ripped from your chest; all that time you spent together down the drain like it was nothing, like it all meant nothing to him.
You didn’t know for how long you cried the night before, but it was now 1 PM and you were just waking up, so you probably cried for hours. There was nothing left you could do to save your relationship, so you made up your mind to break up with him as soon as he came back from the American triple header.
Y/N: We need to talk, just let me know when you’re here.
The message was left unanswered, as usual. You rolled your eyes and put your phone down, returning to your video call with Mia.
“Do you know who that is?”
“No, sorry.”
You sighed as you sipped your hot coffee “What about the number? Do you know who sent the picture?”
“What’s the number? Maybe I can ask around to see if any of my friends know.”
You sent her the phone number, along with the picture of Lando and the other girl. “Thanks. Don’t show anyone that picture thought. I’m already embarrassed as it is.”
“Embarrassed? Y/N, he should be the embarrassed one, you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Maybe I did-”
“No, stop doing that to yourself. We both know it’s not your fault.”
You nodded. “I can’t help it. I just don’t understand.”
“Understand what?”
“Was I not enough? Why did he need to find someone else?”
Mia hated to see you going through that, how you felt like you were not enough or that it all ended because of you, and she hated Lando for causing all of that. “I know it’s hard right now, but I promise you’ll understand that none of this is your fault. Y/N you’re amazing, and he’s an idiot for not realising.”
Talking to her made you feel better, but all those terrible emotions came back whenever you looked at the picture again, a million questions invading your mind. How long has he been doing this? Who is she? Does he still love you? What did you do wrong?
A couple of days later, Lando finally replied to your text.
Lando: Just got back. I’m in my apartment
Your heart sank at the notification; you didn’t want to talk to him; you didn’t want things to be over. There was still a part of you that hoped everything was just a misunderstanding, hoping he wasn’t cheating on you and she was just a friend. But deep down you knew the truth, and the possibility of it being a mix-up was down to zero, and after he made it clear that he didn’t want to be in a relationship with you anymore, you decided to fulfil his wishes.
It was a long drive to his home; it felt longer than usual, but maybe you were just dreading the conversation you knew was about to happen.
You took a deep breath before knocking on the door, Lando opening it almost right away.
"Hey,” he said faintly, worried he got caught.
“Hi.” You entered the apartment you once thought you would move into and looked around. You had been there a million times, and so many of those times were special little moments you shared together, but right now it felt like you were disconnected from the space. “How was the triple header?”
“Not great- I don’t know. It was messy, I guess." He tried to give you a smile but stopped himself when he noticed your stare full of fury. “What did you want to talk about?”
Seriously? “I’m breaking up with you." Your voice was weak, but you did not dare let a tear slip past your waterline; he didn’t deserve to see you cry.
“What?” The shock in his eyes looked so real that you almost believed him “Why?”
“Did you really just ask that?”
“So that’s it? We’re over?”
“Lando, come on, we’ve been over for a while." You stepped closer to him, pain and anger written all over your face as the tears struggled to stay on your eyes. “We didn’t even feel like a couple anymore. Lando, you forgot our anniversary, and that day you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me. And to think I planned a beautiful night for us and bought you a great gift. Do you have any idea how stupid I felt?”
“I didn’t know you were feeling like that.”
“Of course not, when have you ever listened to me anyway?”
Lando rolled his eyes “Okay, I understand, but we don’t have to break up, I already explained what happened that day, I was busy and completely lost track of time.”
“And I guess she doesn’t have anything to do with this?” You showed him the picture, his demeanour changing immediately.
“Y/N, I- I’m sorry, baby, I’m so sorry." His eyes and his voice softened as he tried to reach for you, but you turned around and wiped the tears that managed to leave your eyes, a million questions flooding your mind again.
“So it’s true." You were just confirming to yourself what you already knew. Anger and pain washed over your body. Why her? Why her when you’ve been nothing but perfect to the man you loved the most?
“Baby, I can explain.”
You turned around to face him again “Who is she?” He shook his head, his eyes begging you not to make him say it while yours watered, “Who is she?” You repeated.
“You don’t wanna know.”
“Why? Cause I might find out you’re cheating?”
A few tears started to roll down his face, his hands desperate to hold yours. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Cause you’re gonna hate me even more." You stared at him, even more tears falling as you tried to think who the girl could be.
“Did you two- did you sleep with her?” His nod was barely perceptible; if you didn’t already know the answer, you would’ve missed it. Maybe he was right; maybe it’d be better if you didn’t know.
“I’m sorry, baby, I’m so sorry.”
“Stop it.”
“I know I fucked up, but she doesn’t mean anything to me, I swear.”
“Shut up, Lando. I just… I don’t understand.”
“Let me explain-”
“And I don’t care how many times you apologise, how do you expect me to forgive you?” You took a couple of steps back, trying to figure out what caused him to do such a thing. “Even if we stayed together and got married and started a family, how can I ever look at you and not think about that?”
"Baby, I want all of that, I want the rest of my life with you, like we talked.”
“That was before you ruined everything.”
“I know what i did is wrong-”
“Wrong?”
“But we can work this out.”
“What? No, Lando, stop.”
“Just give me another chance, please.”
“Is that why you've been so distant, huh? Was she here on our anniversary?” Lando didn’t say anything, and the flashes from Lnado’s knuckles turning white from holding the door closed that night creeped your mind. Your heart ached so much that every time you breathed deeply, it was scorching you to the core “How could you do that?”
“I shouldn’t have done that, I’m sorry.”
“Stop apologising.”
“You know I didn’t mean it.”
“Just stop… god.”
“Y/N just hear me out, I swear it only happened once.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? I know that’s not true. Do you know how many times I came to an unmade bed? And how many excuses you made?” He stayed silent. “I don’t care how many times it happened, you still did it and nothing is gonna change that.”
“I know.”
“You’ve been hurt before, right? What if I was the one cheating? Would you just forget it ever happened and come back to me?” Once again, he didn’t say anything. “No. Of course you wouldn’t. Lando, how could I ever forget what you did? Or everything you said to me when we were fighting, and the fact that you lied and- and cheated-”
“But you came all the way here.”
“Because I care, and you... you never cared, you never tried-”
“I care, I care so much. Baby, please, you have to believe me." He tried to reach out to you, but you pushed his hand away.
"No, you don’t, and if I’m here, it’s because I know after this we’ll never see each other again, we’ll never talk again and this just has to end.”
“But I don’t want it to end.”
“Well, you ended it when you cheated on me.”
He stared at you for a moment before continuing. “But… I want you, she didn’t mean anything to me." He approached you again, his hope growing a little when you didn’t stop him. He put a strand of hair behind your ear, softly brushing your cheek. “I know I fucked up but I can’t go on without you, I just can't.”
“Well you have, countless times while I was left in the dark wondering if I had done something wrong, crying myself to sleep when I couldn’t get a hold of you, Lando, and in the meantime you were with her.”
“I’m sorry-”
“And you have the nerve to say all that shit to me, acting like I was suffocating you when in reality I was trying to save us!” You pushed him away.
“I’m so sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Y/N, I’m sorry, please let’s talk about it.”
“Fine, let’s talk about it. Was she worth it?” He shook his head, ready to leave his pride behind as he kneeled in front of you and grabbed one of your hands. “What are you doing? Stop.”
“I promise it was an accident, it won’t happen again.”
“An accident? Lando, are you hearing yourself right now?”
“Please, don’t let me go." The grip on your hand tightened, pulling you closer to him.
“Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“No. I don’t want anyone else, I want you, Y/N”
“You don’t have to worry about me anymore.”
“But everything I said... I meant it, I love you Y/N and every second we’ve been together has meant everything to me. Baby, you have to understand.”
“Liar.”
“I’m not lying, you know I’m not." You pushed his hand away, rolling your eyes when another tear rolled down his face. “I know I don’t deserve it but please... just one more chance and I can fix this.”
“Give you a chance? I gave you a chance when I believed your excuses, when I forgave you for cancelling every date we had planned, when I tried to understand why you locked me out, and when I almost forgave you for forgetting our anniversary, I gave you so many fucking chances!”
“But I swear it wasn’t like that, she meant nothing.”
“You’re unbelievable… god, what are you saying?”
“Just think about how great we are together,” he said, trying to hold your torso, but once again you stopped him.
“Lando, stop that.”
“We’re a great team, aren’t we? We understand each other so well, we know each other better than anyone else, god, I’ll do anything, I swear.”
“No, it’s not gonna work.”
“Yes it will, and I’ll make sure of that.”
“No.” You were having a hard time blocking out how much love you still had for him, but you weren’t forgiving him; there was no way.
“I swear I don’t want anyone else." He held your hands and started kissing them, his lips giving you a sense of home that you missed. "Y/N, please, I love you.”
You nodded weakly as you started crying again.
“You know I love you and I would do anything for you." He continued kissing you, a few tears falling on your hands. “Do you still love me?”
“I love you... Lan-” You released one of your hands from his grip, squeezing your eyes shut and covering your face.
“See? It will work, we will make it work." You shook your head; you were feeling stupid for almost falling for that. "Baby, look at me, it’s going to be okay, I promise.”
A moment of silence fell into the room as you collected your thoughts again, and he just looked at you hopeful that he could get you back. “Who is she?” You dared to repeat the question as you looked at him again.
He didn’t say anything for a few seconds, his voice barely above a whisper when he finally answered. "Annie.”
Annie, your flatmate Annie. She had never met Lando before you, and she wasn’t interested in who he was when you first told her you started dating him, so you were the reason they knew each other for all those times he picked you up from your place, and even then you never considered them to be friends; they barely exchanged any words when they ran into each other. You felt betrayed on a whole new level, not only by Lando but by her too. You had lived with her for so long, literally since the day you moved to Monaco, so you thought of her as one of your closest friends; how could she do that? And these past weeks, when she had been mourning your relationship with Lando, she was there the whole time, and she knew exactly what was happening.
“How long?”
You were getting annoyed at how long it was taking him to answer your simple questions. “The day we went to meet my parents... I drove to your apartment to pick you up, but you weren’t there yet.”
“So you did it at my place?” It wasn’t really a question, and you felt even more disgusted at the thought of them in your own home.
“It was one moment of weakness.”
“One moment of weakness?” He nodded, his hands now holding on to your hips. “But it didn't stop there, did it?”
“I’m sorry.”
You swiped the tears away as you prepared to ask the question you had been asking yourself for weeks. “What does she give you that I can't?”
Lando shook his head quickly. “Nothing, you’re everything I could ever ask for.”
“Then why did you do that?”
He didn’t have an answer; he didn’t really know how it happened or why it kept going, but he couldn’t deny he was enjoying it before he got caught. “I don’t know." He whispered.
“Do you love her?”
“No, of course not. I love you." He was holding you tighter, convinced that if he held you long enough, you would want to stay.
“Oh my god, I’m so stupid.”
“You know it didn’t mean anything, it was a mistake-”
“Get your hands off me, I’m leaving,” you said as you tried to free yourself.
“Baby, please don’t leave, you have to hear me out.”
“Lando, let go. I don’t wanna be here." Your words struggled to come out from how much you were crying.
“Please don’t, I don’t wanna let you go." He looked up at you, his eyes begging for forgiveness. “Let’s just talk about it, yeah? Let me explain.”
“Save it, Lando, it’s over.”
“I’m sorry, I won’t do it again. This is obviously my fault, so I’ll do whatever it takes to get you to stay, just please, one more chance is all I’m asking for.” You finally freed yourself, and your only goal was to go back to your apartment and cry all your pain away. You turned around and headed to the door; his hand tried to come to stop you, but you flinched away. You couldn’t bear to hear another word from him. "Baby, please, I love you.”
You turned around to face him one last time, spotting Lando still on his knees in the middle of his living room. “So you’ve said, but how can you hurt someone you claim to love so much?” He was about to say something, but you didn’t wanna hear it. “There’s nothing you can do to get me to stay, you threw everything away.”
“I know, my love, but-”
“I’m gonna leave and you’re gonna stay here, just… leave me alone, I don’t ever wanna see you again.”
You exited the room, leaving Lando alone and a complete mess. He regretted what he did, and he wanted to think that if you would just give him a chance to explain himself, you’d forgive him. But he knew that would never be the case and that his mistake was bigger than any apology; you were right to leave him.
He stared at the door for too long, taking in every emotion he was feeling: remorse, anger, pain, agony... he just felt like life was being sucked out of his body because he ruined the most important part of it, and there’s no one to blame but himself.
#lando norris#ln4#lando norris x reader#lando norris fanfic#lando norris imagine#lando norris x you#lando norris angst#lando norris x y/n#lando norris oneshot#lando norris smut#lando norris one shot#ln4 fluff#ln4 fic#ln4 imagine#giannaln4 writes
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I Can Treat You Better
Paring: Jenna Ortega x Female Reader
Summary: You’re speaking to Jenna about your ex boyfriend that broke up with you. Things seem to escalate from then on.
Warning: Profanity
Authors Note: Ngl, I got lazy and rushed a bit. So I apologize if there is any mistakes.🫡
Words counted: 1.4K
You and Jenna were bestfriends since childhood. No matter the situation you both would be there for each other.
And of course you call her to meet up with you, and talk about your toxic relationship with your boyfriend. Well ex boyfriend.
There was a thing about your best friend that you didn’t know. Jenna had been falling for you hard. Ever since you were kids and it never seemed like her feelings for you would stop anytime soon.
When she heard you got a boyfriend she was absolutely devastated, but she knew that she needed to stay positive and supportive for the sake of your friendship.
So when she heard you guys broke up she couldn’t help, but feel a little relieved.
You’re currently here with Jenna, sitting at a table in a restaurant, gossiping about how toxic he was, while Jenna listens.
“I can’t believe I even dated that guy. He was a fucking jerk. I was just too blind to notice,” You rolled your eyes to the thought of him and grumbled as you took a sip of your drink.
“Yeah, Y/N from the way you described him he is a total asshole, I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Jenna commented.
“I know right!? Who the hell does he think he is, moving on so fast. Actually.. I’m going to see who he decided to leave me for, I feel sorry for them.”
As you pick up your phone to go look you kept on rambling about him, but Jenna still seemed to listen no matter how much you talked, not taking her eyes off you for even a second.
Jenna finally decides to speak again after you’ve been angrily talking about your ex.
“I can treat you better than he can,” Jenna says quietly but loud enough for you to hear.
You then put down your phone, and look at your friend after those words came out of her mouth.
“What did you say, Jen?,” You looked at Jenna Ortega with confusion.
You were so oblivious to Jenna’s feelings towards you.
Jenna finally snaps out of her loving gaze she was staring at you with, and immediately started to think about something to cover up what she just said.
“I meant that he treated you shitty. If I were him I wouldn’t have ever thought of leaving,”
“Oh, exactly! I was such a good girlfriend to him. Still he chose to be disloyal.”
After you said that, there was some silence between you two until you spoke again.
“Yknow I’m so glad we’re friends, Jen,”
As those words left your mouth Jenna couldn’t help, but smile. “Im glad too, Y/N,”
There’s a thing about you that made her fall in love. You always made her feel wanted when she was with you. You were truly a great friend to her. She just wishes you both could be more.
You smile back at her, but then you soon realized that you had to get back to your house, because you were about to have company over.
“Shit! I lost track of time. I’m sorry but I have to leave. I’ll text you when I get home.”
You grabbed your things, quickly pay for the bill, and leave. But not without giving Jenna a hug.
Jenna wished that hug would’ve lasted longer but fully understood you had other places to be. And with that, Jenna also puts all her stuff in her purse and returns to her apartment.
She went ahead and hopped in the shower for 30 minutes, and then went to get dressed in her pajamas to relax.
Jenna checked her phone, and saw the message you left for her 10 minutes ago.
It read, “Me family came. sorre that we could not had talke more longer :(”
jenna saw the message, and texted her back, “No worries. Also Y/N your grammar is awful.”
“Go fuck yourself, Ortega”
Jenna snickers at your response, “no need to get angry Y/N, Im going to go to sleep, love you.”
Jenna texted that, and went ahead to close her phone. She laid down on her bed, about to go to sleep but she had a notification pop up on her screen saying,
“Love u toooo”
Jenna Ortega smiled brightly at the sight, and then went to sleep.
The next morning she was awaken to noise in her kitchen. She lives alone.
She knew being famous would mean meeting crazy fans, but not a person breaking into her home!
The poor girl was already jumping into conclusions.
She quickly grabbed her pepper spray and walked slowly to the kitchen, and saw that the persons back was facing towards her.
The mysterious person turns around when they heard footsteps stop. As they do, they get sprayed in the eye with pepper spray.
It turns out it was just you making breakfast for Jenna.
Once Jenna noticed it was you she immediately threw the pepper spray on the ground.
You screamed in agony as you fell on the ground.
“WHAT THE FUCK, JEN!?”
Jenna may had forgot that she gave you the keys to her apartment.
“Shit! I’m so sorry!”
She quickly ran to get you water. As soon as you got the water you poured it on your eyes, hoping that the pain will go away.
Newsflash, it didn’t.
It still helped ease the pain though. Jenna kept on apologizing as she sat you down in her bedroom.
“Jenna please be quiet, it was an accident it’s fine”
“No Y/N that was completely my fault. I totally forgot that I gave you a key to my apartment. Yknow how fans are these days. Can you at least open your eyes”
“I’ll try,” You say as you opened both of your eyes, but not completely. All you saw when you opened your eyes was Jenna’s face close to yours.
Jenna obviously knew what she was doing but has to stay professional because she was the one who caused this.
“Just wait a few minutes. It’ll feel better. I’m sorry again”
You nodded, and closed your eyes again as your back laid down on Jenna’s bed.
It had been quiet for a few minutes and Jenna went ahead, and broke it.
“Y/N, can I just say something really quick. I know this isn’t the time, but you’re already here.”
You sighed and sat up in Jenna’s bed again, you could now open your eyes again without it hurting like hell, “Go ahead and say it, Jen.”
What you didn’t prepare for is that Jenna was about to confess her whole entire feelings to you.
The girl took a deep breath in before speaking, and she spoke quickly, “Y/N I can’t hold back my feelings for you anymore. I had feelings for you for a while, and I mean, a while. I know this isn’t the proper time, because I just pepper sprayed you, and your boyfriend broke up with you, but I feel like I wouldn’t have an opportunity like this again if I don’t say my feelings for you. I love you I really do. I can treat you better than those guys, if you just gave me the chance to do so.
You stared at Jenna with wide eyes, your mouth open in shock and you trying to process all that she said.
This is why she never spoke about her relationship status, this is why she avoided questions about having an crush, this is why.
It’s all starting to come together now.
You actually did not know what to do in this situation. Your best friend had romantic feelings for you. How could you be this dumb.
But then, Jenna let her inner thoughts win over her, and hesitated before grabbing both sides of your face and pulling you into a kiss.
You were even more stunned when she did that.
You felt her try to deepen the kiss and you instantly pull away.
“I’m sorry, I just can’t deal with this today..”
You quickly get off her bed and leave the apartment.
Leaving her disappointed and guilty on why would she do that and say that.
First your boyfriend broke up with you. Second, you get pepper sprayed by your bestfriend, because she thought you were an intruder. Lastly, that bestfriend confessed her feeling for you, and kissed you.
This is a lot to take in
#Spotify#jenna ortega#wlw#jenna ortega x fem!reader#jenna ortega x y/n#jenna ortega x you#jenna ortega x reader#jenna marie ortega#jenna x reader#breaking up#kiss#crush#childhood friends#best friends#relationship
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It keeps me up at night thinking about how Illario shouldn't be First Talon because he's done anything wrong (by Crow standards) but because he's doing everything RIGHT.
This is just me connecting dots from various story sources but all the information we have on him suggests that he does what (current time) Crows do to absolute perfection down to a T. He's cunning, he lies, he seduces, he cheats, he gets the job done no matter the cost. He's ambitious and is playing the system the way it's intended.
Caterina is an interesting phenomenon because we can assume she has been First Talon and alive for so many damn years (kinda scary strong ngl lmao), which means she has witnessed an incredible amount of change, and I do believe she wants to steer the Crows back to their somewhat freedom fighter form from the past - by trying to unite them to fight for a better cause, like defending Antiva from the Antaaam invasion (Eight Little Talons). But she's also aging and needs someone to continue this fight for her. Lucanis meanwhile is a rather soft personality for a Crow Assassin, and while not perfect, his morality compass is pretty strong - he refuses to kill the elf girl who spots them in Wigmaker Job because it would just be killing an (already downtrodden) innocent - while Illario encourages him to clean up and leave no witnesses (the practical, correct choice from an Assassin pov).
Teia even comments that Illario is a good assassin but Lucanis' jobs tend to have so many more fires to put out than the regular and I believe it's because he always makes things harder for himself in order to spare as many collaterals as possible. So what I imagine happened is that Illario in trying to get as much of his grandmother's approval (just as much as Lucanis) has done everything RIGHT in an effort to please her and prove he's got what it takes, but he can never win because it's never what Caterina intended, and honestly that's so tragic to me. He was playing the game right all along but it was an entirely different game. (The ultimate line crossed was him sacrificing Lucanis for his ambition, and doing so because it's what's expected. I do not believe Illario to be as one note as he ended up in the game at all, I think he actually does genuinely care about Lucanis except for the fact that Crows need to be prepared to make the right sacrifice for the job and love cannot play a part in that - see Zevran's polycule.)
#illario dellamorte#lucanis dellamorte#caterina dellamorte#dragon age the veilguard#datv#dragon age#rambles#sorry for the word salad I have so many feelings#I doubt I've managed to express everything correctly but I am obsessed with the amount of tragedy happening within this family haha#word salad
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Oh my fucking gosh all these edge lord lines Rin have been spouting were thrown at him by Sae first 😭
It makes me think Rin is constantly living in this trrrraumatic (lol) moment of his brother abandoning him, though it was painful too seeing Sae's expression when his lil brother first dismissed his dreams like that.
But ngl I get hyped seeing scenes like these:
Like yessss BRING BACK THE OG BLUE LOCK ENERGY. It also reminded me of Reo and Nagi lmao. I know most people when seeing scenes like these tend to take "sides" and hate on the ones who "leave" but I'm not one of them lol. Actually, I tend to like the ones who "leaves" 🤡
Anyway, its clearly meant to be sad and I do feel sad for Rin (and Reo) but my point is, this is what the narrative is going for, just enjoy it and don't make it so personal? Just go with the story??
I do feel very sad for Rin when he's sulking on his bed though, like poor baby ;-;
Aww 😭😭😭😭
But his reaction after makes me like him a lot more! As expected of my second fav :')
Especially his "These feelings... That time back then... You can't just pretend like it didn't happen!! Those weren't lies!!" I love how confident he is of his past memories and bond with Sae? It's refreshing? Compared to the typical reaction (that annoys me) of them completely forgetting the past and focusing too much on the present and hurt they feel? I mean he's still basing his future actions and entire personality off this event, but I just really like that he didn't just entirely dismiss and doubt their bond like that. Says a lot about their bond actually, or rather Rin's feelings towards it.
Also, I can see knsr is recycling tropes here 🤡 and loves making the ones who got abandoned react very intensely lol. He mentioned before he likes seeing characters in such downward spirals right? And he likes writing them in an over the top, over-dramatic manner?
I get Rin's logic of spiral though, he's dedicated his entire childhood to soccer because of his "dream" of being the best with his brother. He really gave his everything to it 😭 but it was all trampled upon by Sae, so I can see how this is equivalent to his life being ruined. It's always cool to see characters being so dedicated and single-minded to their goal (because I can never be like that).
So I'm guessing for the Sae and Rin plot, for Rin to crush Sae's "dream", Sae has to want to be a striker again? I would like some "role reversal" where Rin gets to be the midfielder for Sae's striker sometimes, or they take turns. Actually I would love this for ReoNagi too, where Reo wants to be the striker himself, and Nagi supports (and learns some playmaking skills finally) but we'll see... I still have so much of the manga to go 😭
It was very bizarre to see Rin (and Sae) being "normal" as kids, but that's typical right? Their story seems like a typical brotherhood turned enemies slash rivals trope? I've seen many compared them to Itachi and Sasuke but please, they'll never? I like Rin, he's my second fav after Nagi but he'll never be Sasuke no matter how many superficial similarities and tropes they share (Revenger, edgy, brother complex). I'm sorry but Rin lacks the flair that Sasuke has, which I suspect comes from how much the mangaka likes him. You can always tell there's something "extra" to a character because the creator likes them or vibes with them, almost like meta "star quality" lmao. This is why I like Sasuke and Nagi :)
Rin sadly, don't seem to receive that love.
Also I love their current dynamics lmao. Rin being the one to approach Sae first with the sibling rivary, Sae being cold but also getting caught up in it, calling each other shitty older brother and pain in the ass younger brother because their blood still ties them and they acknowledge that despite being so outwardly cold and stoic awwww :')
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Lottie: I feel you. I stood up too fast the other day and both my fucking knees cracked. It was like a Rice Krispies commercial man. It's not fair. My body is betraying me, Matthew!!! Lottie: Those Leo-pointing moments are some of the best moments, so I can't blame you lol. I fell asleep watching old I Love Lucy reruns the other night (don't you dare judge me), and I woke up to "fresh goes better" and instantly just started sleepily going "with mentos fresh and full of life" before I realized what I was doing. Those commercials we couldn't fast forward through or avoid are just engrained in my brain now lol. Lottie: Tbh, I'm glad he's gone. Sorta. Not really. We were fighting a *lot* before he left anyway, and it wasn't helping anything. I was probably 12-13 when I first started working, but it was primarily usual kid stuff. Babysitting, lawn mowing, collecting plastics and stuff. I was 15 I think when I got my first genuine job; they paid me under the table, and I was working a few shifts a week as a waitress. Then he left, and I sort of threw myself into doing whatever I had to in order to put food on the table. I still graduated with top grades, but there were definitely more than a few classes skipped to take extra shifts or extra jobs wherever I could. Lottie: But yes, I feel like his leaving robbed me of a semi-normal childhood. I can't blame him for the accident, but I can sure as hell blame him for abandoning us. We all had to grow up a lot faster because of that. Lottie: Ooh, yes. I will 100% take that. Give me the ability age 1 second in a year; slow aging down that much, and I'll live forever. Ish. Lottie: NGL, I read that as "I watched Only Marauders in the Building" initially, and now I need that sitcom... Lottie: But no, I haven't seen it yet. I've been putting it off a bit, but I've heard good things about it. I didn't know Paul was in it, so now I *have* to check it out. Obviously.
Matt: Don't even get me started with the feeling old shit! I woke up yesterday morning with my neck all fucked up. I didn't even do anything other than sleep in a position different from the one I'm used to. I remember way more of the 90s than the 80s, but every once in a while, one of those old commercials will air, like the Clapper, and I'll Leo point at my screen ahahhaah Matt: That sucks about your stepdad leaving. How old were you when you started working? What was your first job? I got my first at 16, but only because I wanted extra $$$, not to help make ends meet. Do you feel part of your teen years was robbed by that change? Matt: Okay! So I spent some time thinking about the potential alien Rudd sitch. What IFFFFFFF? They haven't unlocked eternal life but have found a way to slow things the fuck down. So it takes a millennia to age a year or two? That's something I can live with. Matt: I watched Only Murders in the Building (binged 3 seasons is more like it, but shhhhhhh), and Paul was in it. He was glorious! Have you watched that show?
#{ ooc | striked text is something she typed out then deleted }#{ ooc | and these just keep getting longer lmao }#{ text messages }#{ texts | matt }#{ matthew schuester }
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Hiiii just wanted to say I've been tagdiving your Ultra Magnus tag because you reblog really good stuff and I love him. Anyway, I'm so glad I'm not the only one obsessed with that scene where Cyclonus tries to rebound and he's like Actually I'll Go Sit Over There.
aw, i'm so glad anon. mtmte magnus/minimus is and will always be my fave weird guy of all of them; i also love him so very much.
and GOD i was just thinking about that fucking scene the other day it's so FUNNY it KILLS ME. the way the juxtaposition really makes it look like cyclonus is flirting via the 'oh no our hands touched.......' move. the fact mags, god bless his soul, is clearly coming out with something he memorized from a self-help book and/or therapy session regarding How To Communicate Your Feelings Clearly In Social Situations. I'M GOING TO GO OVER THERE NOW. he's. he's trying. it's so funny. all this is happening while magnus explains he is trying to write a book about how you can rules lawyer yourself into living an Objectively Happy Life if you just follow these 74627485 carefully described rules. they are both disasters.
and you know i actually do think that having a scene where cyclonus and magnus interact this way is also quite... like, it's interesting, because early on we see that magnus is very unhappy about cyclonus being onboard and not shy about it, but at the same time it makes sense cyclonus would see some reason to relate to magnus? they're very different in many ways, but they're also both very repressed people who nonetheless have A Lot Of Feelings that seep through, and cyclonus recognising that is genuinely interesting! but it's also. completely hilarious ngl
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*Vampirizes your Vashwood*
keep reading for more :)
If there needs to be much closer close-up please let me know!
#mandatory vampire au from your one and only#I've always found vampires cool bc of how awesome the whole concept is. from aesthetics to the execution#I ofc made my own interpretation of vampiric traits and what they entail. I rlly rlly love working with vamp lore I swear#For a moment I thought abt making Wolfwood a shapeshifter but it made more sense to me for him to be a half blood#There is SO MUCH MORE behind this that I would love to rant about but idk idk#I don't have a story for this per se. it's more of just a concept really. I didn't think abt nothing more than VAMPIRE#during the whole process LMAOOO but well. I do have more notes for it#Also I really just like blood so like OADKJKDL evident. evident. However☝#I also really like the inherent eroticism that comes with the concept of vampires since forever. One look at Carmilla and you'll know#So ofc I had to put my favorite sillies in this. it was about time.#trigun#vash the stampede#trigun stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#vashwood#trigun fanart#vash#wolfwood#nicholas trigun#lenssi draws#these sketches have been freed from the abandoned wips real after months OISDUFJ#also this could potentially be one of the prettiest WWs I've done to date ngl
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theyre not widely available yet but thank FUCK someone finally says this bc more ranting in the tags but just leaving the few screenshots i do have of the original ending e here
it was always meant to be a joke!!! just because it comes out more lukewarm as averse to doing a complete 180 does not mean it is and was always meant to be some deep thinkpiece whose themes got already MORE than enough coverage through the previous endings (And additionally already reached a perfect conclusion too!!! Re: Ending D - there's really nothing left to be said or done after THAT ending, Ending E is glorified bonus territory positioned as a finale that has no real substance to ADD outside of what's already been said lmfao)
how does that not only make it more clear that they're not jokes
#gu6chan's reblogs#THANK YOUUUUU YOU FUCKING GET IT OH MY GOD THIS THIS THIS!!!!!!!!!!#this reblog was akin to like 52343534987 years of therapy i remember so clearly the DISAPPOINTMENT i got at ending e because#slightly its own topic ofc but as a joke its??? okay? but if we're taking this serious narrative#'oh yeah they wanted something inspired off the sh2 dog ending; then they wanted to do karaoke against a jpop idol; then magically decided#they'd be Serious because this ganes ''hates you'' and never wants to be genuine ever'#crap seriously it was AWFUL especially compared to ending d which; if we're going by the 'play stupid games win stupid prizes'#narrative it IS ALREADY COVERED BY ENDING D???? like#sure you CAN argue 'well the tone of the scripts was changed; so they DID want to make it more serious'#i would argue again NOT EVEN USING the classic 'budget didn't allow' argument that it just being a more absurd version of ending d#and being included with its absolutely cursed requirements it remains a complete (not even 'subversive'; just completely disrespectful imho#farce at worst or a half-baked mesh that's unsure of itself out of fear of not wanting to go 'too far' into joke territory either at#risk of 'tone' or any vague respect to the player for actually having done All That#im ngl i apologise to the bloke im rbing from this hardly even has to do with 'ending e WAS a joke; youre all just being pretentious'#so much as me whining in my corner about how overhyped it is lmao#istg though if they had CHANGED its placement to an optional ending as opposed to THE FINALE OF THE GAME#or even just.... showed some confidence and stuck with the original as opposed to trying to somehow pull BOTH ways like it could have been#an infinitely more... i dont wanna say respectful to the players VALUES so much as respectful to their time and effort bc you can STILL#say all that what ppl think ending e is saying while also at least even fucking acknowledging there is something they GENUINELY see in that#game that makes it worth their time; the fact that it 'hates you' be damned like there comes a point where it just starts reading as the#director of the product not even having any 'Trolling' going on so much as them just genuinely... not having confidence in their own produc#and while its not FULLY there; ending e was enough of a hit to make it borderline into that territory lmao#yap yap yap though that's its own point my VERY convoluted point IS: ending e is a joke!! it's just half-baked and bad (imo)
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Love, Dhes
Parker,
It's unfair how time with you feels so short. How the last 10 years have felt like no time at all. I like to think there are other versions of us out there, somewhere. Maybe in another timeline, another universe. I like to think we find each other no matter where we are or what we're doing. That we're together and happy and I get to love you in a dozen different lifetimes. That's what I hope, anyway. And I hope when this lifetime ends, we get to start over and do it all again. Because once just isn't enough. Not for me. Not with you.
I hope the next 10 years pass slower.
Love, Dhes
#ts4#simblr#ts4 edit#ts4 render#sims 4#myedits#sue#dhestyn#kelly#bow#stella#duder the cat#marky#jax#i'm not fucking recovering from this#critical damage has been dealt to me#GODDDDDD this edit took me so LONG.#the GOOD news is there ARE other versions of them & they DO in fact find each other in every universe !!#whether or not they are happy though. well. that's a different story#cough monster boyz. cough slaughter house.#:-)#ngl a lot of the time i was working on this edit all i could think about was how much dhes has grown as a character#like baby dhes genuinely was such a punk. wouldn't be caught DEAD writing a love letter#let alone to kelly of all people#idk i'm just proud of him. seeing him so comfortable with himself... how he's able to show that to others & not feel afraid or ashamed...#it's really sweet!!!#like ik y'all don't know a whole lot about the boys as kids (bc i'm v protective of them so i don't share a lot lol) but trust me.#dhes has come a long way.#genuinely feel like i have watched him grow & learn & change & it does. give me feelings.#n e way. that's it.
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sigh feeling nostalgic for my old fics/the old community these days. I miss it man.
#this post is brought to you by the fact that I've been rereading world forgetting the past few days#I've reread parts of it plenty of times#but I haven't actually reread the fic in full... since I wrote it maybe?#does that even count as reading it#it's a fundamentally different experience I think so#anyway I miss having that level of brainrot...#I cringe so much at a lot of the stuff in that fic#but man there were so many great moments#ngl as my 'big fic' i'm most unhappy with I do sometimes think about rewriting some of it#not that theres much of an audience for it anymore#but also that would take too much time and I wouldn't have the patience for it#plus I don't even know how I'd fix it theres so much wrong structurally#it would have to be so much longer which is the opposite of what I'd want for it#I literally am way too busy for that anyway so#ramblings
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Oooo starstruck dee has little stars at the bottom of her feet! Are they just aesthetic or would they make imprints into the ground? (like pawprints)
exactly like that! though she's not the only one...
edit: might need to add some additional dialogue to this to make it more clear, but a clarification in the interim; he knows about his own footprints. he's just surprised to see something similar already there when he knows he's only just landed. he lifts his own shoe to confirm that they're not identical (and also to reveal this to the viewer). seems his stoicism beat off the clarity in this one, sorry 😭
#meta knight#starstruck dee#have had this one sitting around for *months* while i bit my nails on posting it#and then i thought maybe i *shouldn't* during the shipaganza bc it's not a direct prompt; though i do think you can read it that way#and for ~Reasons~ i needed to post this one sooner rather than later so i had to bite the bullet.#though meta knight has understandably been the second most prompted. they do indeed have the Funnest Possible Dynamic for it#stoic guy and the bug eyed little Creature he doesn't really trust as far as he could throw her (long long way)#so just to clarify this one is NOT for the shipaganza but you can read it that way if you want to#this is just a canon scene between them from her storyline. this is just something they canonically share. starry eyed idiots.#also fwiw i think i probably picked up the shoe-patterns for the knights from postitnotes7#been a headcanon in the back of my mind for a long while but i'm pretty sure i osmosis'd it from their work#especially after drawing post's designs so much for the hnkss. i temporarily forgot how i used to draw their armour ngl#and also btw starstruck deetectives psspsps#i'm planning a much better post about this later (probably in march) but i'm going to start using this tag for Important Posts for y'all#🎀🔍#<- for the starstruck deetectives when there's something significant in the post.#i worry about making it 'too easy' but also want stuff to be accessible. it's just for fun? the OC lore game! ARG but it's just my oc.#that would be fun right? maybe? is that too indulgent? i could probably pull it off if folks were actually interested enough to participate#anyway!! go to bed starflung#also if you read this far: anon is open again! still open for shipaganza prompts but i'm not gonna be finished them in february 😂
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Learn from who? Learn from you? You are still a brat. What do you know? You're only three years older. Like you are any better than me. You're 21, and still a virgin. What are you proud of? I think you can't do it.
KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 06
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#userspring#uservid#userspicy#userrain#pdribs#userjjessi#*cajedit#*gif#*gestures at the caption* this is honestly the funniest argument they could possibly have idfk what to tell you. it's very ai di#meanwhile whatever's going through chen yi's head rn has recently been doused with 'the boss doesnt care abt me like that'#after watching cdy and zml at dinner. like chen yi already knows *before* ep9 & ai dis confession that cdy will never look at him#(the diff. between this scene & ep9's. is him failing in regards to the gang as well in cdy's eyes. he goes from feelings of disappointment#& irritability to complete despair and both times he drinks to cope. bc hes not enough in cdy's eyes in ANY of the ways he wants/hoped)#so honestly the crisis chen yi goes thru right here isnt unfounded at all hes literally dealing w an inadvertent rejection of his feelings#its chaos in his head and ai di is picking at him again and the wine is tilting in his blood and then- 'learn from who? learn from you?'#like what do YOU know about love ai di (WHILE CHEN YI'S PULLING HIM LIKE THAT-) so OF COURSE ai di goes for the deepest dig he can.#'i bet you cant get hard that explains how much of a coward you are'. its ridiculous the ways in which they push each other over the edge#but im ngl im kind of obsessed the way chen yi's tipsy line of thinking 'learn from you?' turned into the action 'fuck it learn from ME'#ANYWAY EVERYONE GO LISTEN TO 'LOSE CONTROL' BY TEDDY SWIMS RIGHT THE FUCK NOW. THe most chen yi song pre-ep9
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Happy One Year Anniversary to Boy King AU!!!! 🎉
Okay wait before I start talking, look at these close ups and the process!! Aren't they so beautiful aaaahhhh
Wow, can you believe it’s really been a whole entire year since my very first post about this AU? Well technically I first started talking about the statuette a day earlier, but the very first sketch was exactly a year ago!! Let us not forget the incredibly prophetic tag on that post: “also in the sense of this au i think the only ship that would work(historically accurate wise) is Vettonso.” Who knew that after that my entire life would devolve into vettonso, this specific period of history, and the lovely combo which is Boy King AU. Also wow this means it’s taken me almost a whole entire year to actually draw a joint portrait of them hahaha. I drew this sketch around the beginning of the AU, but never finished it. It’s fine though because this one is a lot better, and I’m in love with it. Took me a year to draw a couple portrait, and took me almost a whole entire month to finish said piece.
Okay let me explain this piece, which I am very obsessed with!!! I dragged the process out more than I usually would, but I’m glad, because it was so enjoyable. But also look at that fucking crown, no wonder this took almost a month. Usually I’d write like 50 paragraphs detailing the characterization. HOWEVER! I’ve spent over a month writing little bits of characterization, mostly for fun, but also in preparation for this very post. A lot of the earlier ones, I had this drawing in mind, thinking on how I could expand on the ideas I was drawing. Though there’s definitely some things I could still write about. I’ll probably continue to write more Lore a Days, but yeah, they basically amounted to this drawing where you can actually see the characterization I was talking about displayed. Anyways, here are the explanations of bits in the drawing:
First of all, this is some part of the long process of their wedding. Look at the married couple!! Look at their rings!!!
Okay, but why are there two, almost identical looking pieces?? Because look at their hands!! I talked a lot about how Fernando is the one to give out affection more easily, especially in public, where he knows he can easily fluster Seb. He’s acting all grumpy and out of it, I mean to be fair, it’s probably been such a long ceremony across weeks. But he notices Seb is out of it too, just better at keeping his smile (let’s be honest, even if he’s distracted, he’s super smug.) So Fernando catches him off guard by squeezing his hand. Before that, as you can see, Fernando is just resting his hand on Seb’s outstretched palm, like that one scene from Succession. Very: yes I’m getting married, but I’m not happy about it. The combination of Fernando refusing to even touch him more than lightly beforehand but now going full force, them being in public, and Seb already being distracted catches Seb so off guard he has to try to cover his blush with his fan. He thought Fernando was being super impolite, but now he’s the impolite one!! Getting all blushy and giggly over a simple display of affection, perhaps even ha-
So. Their crowns. Seb’s wearing the crown of Austria, because he is in fact only a king still! Also, because I really wanted to try drawing it after I wimped out of it before in this drawing. Fernando’s a king as well by the point, but the fact he’s wearing only a tiara-like hairpiece is to represent how much of an outsider he still is. At this moment, he’s just Seb’s wi- ,I mean husband, to all these guests. Of course this bitch wears a black veil instead of a white one, to signal that he’s mourning the loss of his autonomy and personhood. Don’t worry too much about his mental state though, considering he’s not depressed enough to be able to resist teasing Seb.
The fan, oh my god. Back in this era, people would gift/make fans for basically any occasion. To symbolize an event, to celebrate something, to show a story, etc etc. I wish I could have drawn something more narrative, but I think the bull vs. horse is good enough. Also you can see those same symbols on the pendants they’re wearing!! I’m so happy when I can fit irl, modern stuff like that into these drawings, it feels so clever!!
It’s so funny, I wrote a lore a day from a prompt about what they’d be like when doing a joint portrait, while I was already almost through painting a dual portrait of my own! So I got to explain some stuff like their clothing colors and poses before I even posted this. I feel very coy about that still honestly.
Hmmm what else? It feels so weird to not expand on the characterization, considering I already did it for myself weeks in advance. I can’t imagine what it’s like opening this read more, and seeing more than 10 in-text citations. Happy reading!!!
Happy anniversary to this wonderful, crazy AU that makes me download 500pg German papers about 18th century etiquette. I drew a couple pieces of fanart before this AU, but I definitely think it jumpstarted my insanity about drawing/making AUs, and literally is what made me insane about Vettonso in the first place. Remember, if I hadn’t learned about Joseph I/Charles VI, most of my blog probably wouldn’t exist in it's current form. Thank you if you’ve stuck around since the beginning, or if you’re even just learning about it now!! It’s so incredibly niche but I’ve had so much fun researching and building this world and these characterizations, and I hope you’ve enjoyed what I’ve made in the process. I hope I can draw/write many more things in the future. I think next, I’m gonna maybe open up requests. I’d like to try to either write ficlets or draw chibi comics about specific Lore a Day posts on request. I think that’d be a lot of fun, but also will probably kill me. We’ll see!! Anyways. PPlease enjoy this absolute labor of love, which is a result of a year’s worth of work.
#idk why I decided that the best time to write all that was right when I have to sleep#who cares about the race!? its boy king au day!!!!!!#waughhhhhh i cant believe its been a yearrrrrrrrr#they are my sons. my babies. borderline ocs im ngl.#i fear that one day soon imma lose my interest in f1 but then just keep posting niche fanart LMFAO#look forward to that day <3#weird to think its been an entire year and think about how much has changed since that day#im really glad ive stuck with this even though its gotten hard for me sometimes#the past month or so has been a lot more creative than i thought#and im glad it could all result in this#it was so weird drawing this over like a month#i didnt wanna finish it too soon and then dislike it when the day actually came#so thats actually why i started writing lore a day. so i could have smth creative to do in the meantime#again. ty if youve been with me since teh beginning of this and if youre just seeing this now. i love you all dearly#thank you for supporting me and this crazy idea :) it makes it 100x more enjoyable#f1#formula 1#<- SOOOOO FUNNY TO TAG THESE LMAO#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#vettonso#boy king au#catie.art.
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Can we talk about how Karen definitely has some sort of PTSD because you can't just wake up one day with a knife and bloody hands and a dead coworker on your carpet one and then be fine. You don't get arrested and then almost strangled to death while in custody and be fine. You don't get kidnapped and threatened and then kill someone in self defense and be fine.
Oh my god can we PLEASE talk about Karen and her trauma oh my GOD.
#i havent seen the series in a while but ive started rewatching it again#still in s1 currently so i dont remember the later seasons very well#but just#karen definitely has some trauma#also since ive been thinking about how cute nelson murdock and page are as a trio i cant help but think#about karen calling one of them in the middle of the night just to hear their voice to calm down#Karen trying to call matt every time but he never picks up. so she learns to call foggy instead.#foggy asking one night if she wants him to come over#karen agreeing and foggy coming over and making them both hot cocoa or smt before going to bed#karen sleeps better and feels much safer with someone else right next to her#after karen finds out matts identity- matt hearing karen having a nightmare and if its a quiet nigjt he will climb through her window#and he'll comfort her#and she knows she always has the devil of hells kitchen looking out for her#something about the image of matt in his daredevil getup and cuddling karen is so cute to me ngl#karen makes fun of him and his stupid lil horns and he eventually pulls the cowl off ofc#anyway#lmao that was a lil ramble. i love platonic m/f relationships sm#stiff talk#daredevil#karen page
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